I said I was going to write a book

[Slidell]

I doubt you'll get it unless you played ME2 and DAO. Hell I wrote it and I don't know what the **** is going on. Also watching the video called the PRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIZZZEEEE would help some. God this awful. This is what boredom does to me, well I'm like this most of the time I just keep it on the inside.

 

THIS

IS

Shepard needs to find the remote.

The book about the anecdote.

 

Chapter 1 of 1/2

 

"Miranda have you seen the remote? Because as you know it's Thursday and Thursday is vorcha thrash throwdown." "Sorry Shyepard there's allot of work to do. Maybe later?" "Yeah bu-" "Work to do." Shepard walks away dejected, Rupert usually has it, but he said he didn't have it. Sometimes Shepard thought he just hid it from him to get a rise out of him.

"Garrus, my good friend." Shepard thought to himself "He'll help. I think I should say that when I get there." "Garrus, my good friend." Said Shepard "You'll help me." "Help you what?" said Garrus. He didn't even look up. "He must be doing those calibrations again." Thought Shepard. "Just wait he'll say. Can it wait a minuet Shepard? I'm in the middle of some calibrations." "Can it wait a minuet Shepard? I'm in the middle of some calibrations." said Garrus. "See I told you. That asshole." Said Shepard. "What?" Asked Garrus. "What Legion?" Said Shepard. Shepard walked away. "Heh man I played that smooooth. I didn't get to be come a specter by not thinking on my feet." Thought Shepard

"Legion, he's a machine. I bet he has some sort of bond with the remote or something." As Shepard approached the AI core which seemed the worst place to put Legion to Shepard he heard a weird sound. He peaked through the door... Lee John Mobile platform 203 was doing the robot. He took out his space cellphone took some pictures and ran away. "I'll just put these up on spacebook." Said Shepard.

"I doubt Samara has it. I don't even think Justicars are allowed to watch space tv." Something dawned on Shepard. "Justicar... Just a car. Holy crap I just blew my own mind." said Shepard.

"Kasumi that little klepto, I bet she took it. Now how do I sneak into her room... Aha, Laundry cart." Shepard abruptly went down into engineering to hide in the laundry cart. "I should have thought this through, how the hell am I supposed to push myself back up to the crew deck? Well it's to late now, I'm covered in old stinky clothes, Garrus needs to shower more.I should talk to him about that. I'll pay Zaeed to do it"

"Zaeed, my Australian? South African? I don't know, whatever you are I need your help" "For whut Shepuhd?" "I need you to push me in the laundry cart up to the crew deck and into Kasumi's room so I can sneak out when she's not there and go through her drawers." Shepard realized what a ridicules request this was, Zaeed didn't seem to mind though. "Okay Shepuhd." said Zaeed. And before he knew it he was in Kasumis room. "Muahaha, I'm so inconspicuous, thought Shepard now all I need to do is wait." An hour went by then two hours then three, she finally left. He hopped out dug around in the couch found some money and drew currly q mustaches on priceless peaces of artwork, but alas no remote. He hopped back in. Realizing that there was no point in getting back in he went out the front door.

"Well I've missed it by now but this is a matter of principle." "I will not be beaten by an inanimate object." Said Shepard. "Maybe Jack's seen it." He went back down to engineering. "Jack? Have you see-" "**** off."Said Jack. "Never mind" Said Shepard.

"I'll go ask Yacoben." "Jacob. Have you seen the remote?" "The prriiizzzzeeee?" said jacob. "Yeah... I guess you could call it that. Have you seen it?" "The PPPPPRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIZZZZZZZEEEEEE." "Right, the prize have you seen it?" "It's a heavy risk." "What is?" "But the priiiiiiizzzzzzzeeeeee" "Oh Jesus Christ I'm done." Meanwhile Samara just got finished watching the space tv, and gave the remote to Rupert.

 

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Screamed Alistair."What, what?" asked the Warden "I just had an awful dream it made no sense, like some guy wrote it out of boredom." "And some weird uninteresting black guy kept talking about the prize." "It's okay Alistair there's no such thing as the prize." "I know. I know."

 

-Fin

Edited May 22, 2010 by Slidell

[Lockon]

Needs moar romance

[Slidell]

What with the remote?